Drunk Cowboy Sages

Thursday, June 12, 2025

Drunk Cowboy Sages

Today’s special animal friend is the Gila monster, Heloderma suspectum. This lizard grows up to 21 inches long and weighs up to 3 lbs. Their skin is black, mottled with salmon pink or yellow. The skin of these animals is called '“beaded” or “studded” because the scales, except on the belly, contain little round pieces of bone called “osteoderms.” The Gila monster is the only venomous lizard in the United States. Four other Heloderma species, known as “Mexican beaded lizards,” are found in Mexico and Guatemala.

The venom of the Gila monster is considered as toxic as that of the Western diamondback rattlesnake. Symptoms include excruciating pain, swelling, and falling blood pressure. The venom is full of peptides, glycoproteins, and other organic chemistry stuff. One of these chemicals, helodermin, inhibits the growth of lung cancer in humans, and another is used in treatments for Type-2 diabetes. No deaths have been attributed to Gila monster bites since 1930; reported deaths prior to 1930 are now attributed mainly to poor treatment and/or massive consumption of alcohol.

Frontier settlers considered the victims of Gila monster bites to be real dopes. These lizards are reclusive — spending around 90% of their time in burrows — slow, and not aggressive. The Gila monster’s venom is believed to be a defensive adaptation rather than one used in hunting. The diet of Gila monsters includes small mammals, reptiles, birds, eggs, and carrion. Live prey is killed with a powerful bite and swallowed whole. An adult can eat up to 1/3 of its own weight in one meal.

Gila monsters “brumate” from October to March, resting underground in a low-energy state except on unusually warm, sunny days. They emerge from their burrows by April and mate during April and May. Males detect females by scent, using their tongues to sense pheromones in the air. Males sometimes fight one another.

An uninterested female will bite and chase the male, but if they like one another, the female will eventually lay around six eggs in a burrow such as an abandoned pack rat nest.

Hatching in the wild was first observed in 2016, when a nest was uncovered by a construction crew. The eggs were hatching at the end of October, and the young immediately went into brumation with the mother, emerging in April to begin hunting. Natural predators, especially of young, include coyotes and birds of prey. They can live up to 40 years in the wild.

Gila monsters are considered Near Threatened by IUCN. Habitat loss is the greatest threat. They are occasionally hunted for food in Mexico, and collection for the pet trade is not unusual. In addition, they are killed because they are believed to be dangerous to people. It is surprising this is still an issue, when even drunk cowboys 150 years ago knew better.